Hecklin'

I Wrote A Thing

2006-04-03T22:01:00.000-07:00

I just got one of those things. You know the ones where you go "oh man... what was I just going to do". Then I remembered. "Oh yeah I was going to start that webcomic". Then I remembered, "Oh yeah I can't draw". Then I thought, "I'll talk about webcomics then! Eric Burns did it!". Of course, Eric Burns can write. I can't do that either. I've had moments of wit, brief, but undeniable, but it's nothing to build something so significant and substantial as a blog off of (wait...). So I'm in a predicament. I want to be loved by the masses, yet not have to expose my hideous countenance to them, but I suck at the internet. What to do? What to do...

...

I seem to have written myself into a corner here. I'll get back to you.

Kristopher Straub Rocks.

2006-04-02T20:49:00.000-07:00

Dude, Kristopher Straub Rocks.

Really.

Dude.

Dude

2006-03-30T22:40:00.000-08:00

Have I talked about how much I love Perfect Stars? I love Perfect Stars.

I love the fictional dialogues between Oscar Wilde and Bosie wherein Oscar eloquently professes his love for Bosie only to have him (Bosie) respond with a bitter jab about Oscar's weight.

comedy.

Problems With The Place That I Live In

2006-03-23T14:20:00.000-08:00

Question: I live in a pretty small town (currently). But it is a pretty cool small town. There is a decent selection of "local color" businesses, two of the higheset-tech McD's in the country, a Wal-Mart, several gas stations, and a porn store. Why do we not have a comic shop? This is a college town people. Do you know how good of business you would turn opening the only pretentious indie comic shop in town? Come on people. Get on the ball.

A day is an interminable period of time.

2006-03-07T21:52:00.000-08:00

I'm fuck serious. It is ridiculous.

Oh man, last night I totally had sex with like 3 hot nekkid chix.

2006-03-01T20:36:00.000-08:00

Is it still cool for 17 year olds to have boners for Conor Oberst? I hope not.

In other news, I've spent about 2 hours over the course of three or so days using my newfound proficiency in Ada 95 to make it so that when I type "omg", "wtf", or "lol" into a terminal it prints out something humorous.

Also: In the wise words of one R. Beef Kazenzakis "What sucks is life".

If I end up going to grad school for english or literature (knock the hell out of that wood) I think I'll do my dissertation on Achewood or other webcomicera. If nothing else it could delay my long, slow, sad descent into being the guy who lives in an apartment, 38, with too many accounts on too many online tech fora and a bizarre fixation on recursive acronyms. Still never having known the touch of a woman (though that one's pretty much "fo' sho" anyway). I don't know what that has to do with anything.

I Like The Idea Of Treble Woofers... Drive Around Listening To The Clash, Shatterin' Windows...

2006-03-01T13:39:00.000-08:00

HEY

Free Software, Free Culture.

2006-01-05T12:04:00.000-08:00

Lemme lay it all out on the line for y'all.

Free Software, Free Culture.

Here's what it's all about. The freedom to use information. The
freedom to redistribute information. The un-inhibition of information by government and corporate entities. The invalidation of software idea-patents. Adoption of Creative Commons as a universal standard. Reform of copyright law.

This is important, because when one powerful entity (gov't, company, w/e) controls all the information, it's at least as dangerous as one company controlling the energy supply. And currently, MS controls around ninety percent of the world information. And they have no scruples about commiting acts that are anti-freedom and anti-democratic, as their recent acts as a digital strongarm for the Chinese Government show. Arresting bloggers and censoring search results are not the actions of a group of people I want to trust with controlling the world's information. And they have the market in a firm grasp of consumer ignorance. Most people don't even realize that "Windows" is a seperable entity from "My Computer" or that Internet Explorer is different from "The Internet". And the only Windows alternative they are aware of is Macintosh, but they fail to really understand the difference between the two, believing macs to simply be a different shell on top of essentially the same thing. This is a huge card in MS's favor. As long as their customers remain intimidated and impressed by seeing "omg intel inside 3.6 jiggahertz so fast windows home xp omg" and learn to be as intelligent in their technology consumer choices as they are for cars or any other expensive commodity.

Okay so it's not quite "all on the line" but it's all I got right now.

That Creepy Ass Burger King. . . Thing, I Don't Know. . .

2005-12-15T21:14:00.001-08:00

You've seen this shit. That creepy ass thing in the goddam plastic mask either A) Looks at you through your window while you sleep, B) Appears in the forest, or C) Fucking wakes up next to you like a goddam horse head from the Don.

Not to mention one of the latest spots has him appearing all Kong-A-Riffic to a frightened Faye Wray knockoff and handing her a digitally oversized whopper that looks about as appetizing as a moose turd. A fucking meat turd. That's what it is. A meat turd handed to you by a fancy dressed up serial killer.

Fuck Burger King.

Crazy Tinfoil Hippy Liberal Wacko RMS

2005-12-12T12:34:00.000-08:00

I pulled this from someone on Facebook who pulled it from Bruce Perens' website

"The opinions here are mine. I am a full-time employee of Sourcelabs. They sponsor me to spend half of my work time being an Open Source leader, and they pay for my travel. The company has agreed not to attempt to set my agenda or control my speech. Questions: write to me: bruce at perens.com PRESS: It's OK to quote this material. Friday, November 18: Richard Stallman Gets in Trouble with UN Security for Wearing a Tin-Foil Hat

Richard Stallman, Mark Shuttleworth, and I are in Tunis, Tunisia for the UN World Summit on the information society. We've had an interesting day :-)

Richard is opposed to RF ID, because of the many privacy violations that are possible. It's a real problem, and one worth lobbying about. At the 2003 WSIS in Geneva, there was objection to the RF ID cards that were used, resulting in a promise that they would not be used in 2005. That promise, it turns out, was not kept. In addition, Richard was given a hastily-produced ID with a visible RF ID strip. Mine was made on a longer schedule, it seems, and had an RF ID strip that wasn't visible. I knew it was there because they clearly had us put our cards to a reader at the entrance gate.

You can't give Richard a visible RF ID strip without expecting him to protest. Richard acquired an entire roll of aluminum foil and wore his foil-shielded pass prominently. He willingly unwrapped it to go through any of the visible check-points, he simply objected to the potential that people might be reading the RF ID without his knowledge and tracking him around the grounds. This, again, is a legitimate gripe, handled with Richard's usual highly-visible, guile-less and absolutely un-subtle style of non-violent protest.

During his keynote speech at our panel today, Richard gave a moment's talk about the RF ID issue, and passed his roll of aluminum foil around the room for others to use. A number of people in the overcrowded-to-the-max standing-room-only meeting room obligingly shielded their own passes. UN Security was in the room, not only to protect us but because of the crowd issue, and was bound to notice. Richard and I delivered our keynotes, followed by shorter talks by the rest of the panel and then open discussion.

At the end of the panel, I went out in the hall to be interviewed by various press entities including Al Jazeera. Another item for my CIA dossier, but I'm sure my association with Richard would have caused more notes to be taken today. I was busy with the press for two solid hours. So, I didn't see what happened with Richard. But a whole lot of the people in the room did, and stayed with Richard for the entire process.

Apparently, UN Security would not allow Richard to leave the room.

Richard and I are actually here representing the United Nations, and are carrying UN Development Program IDs. I would otherwise merit a "business entity" ID, but I guess because of our kenote-speaker status our UN Development Program hosts ordered us better treatment. Richard and I also have some limited immunity as delegates to this conference. So, this was no doubt an interesting problem for the security folks, who had no real idea who Richard was except that he was someone reasonably distinguished who was visibly violating their security measure.

All of this completely disrupted the panel that was supposed to follow ours in that room, and the folks operating that panel were rightly furious.

UN Security eventually let him out, and then would not allow him to enter the room where he was appearing on another panel.

I got to the room just as the panel was about to start, at the moment that the problem suddenly evaporated and Richard was allowed to enter. No doubt some of our UN hosts had been dealing with security during those two hours, and eventually got an order from a high-enough officer or something. We'll probably never know who, but imagine the headlines: Kofi Anan frees Richard Stallman. So, I walk in and Richard relates the entire situation to me in front of the audience present, including more than one government minister, and other folks arriving for the panel. I humorously remind Richard that he and I both have immunity as delegates, and he responds "Well, perhaps then I should have killed Bob Kramer". Kramer is the CompTIA representative who comes along to these things to relate an pro-software-patenting and generally anti-Free-Software viewpoint which gets Richard very steamed up. There's a laugh, and I explain that our immunity probably doesn't go that far. Richard goes on to say that he wouldn't really kill anyone, but no doubt UN Security has heard this entire exchange too.

I didn't see anyone further molesting Richard, but I'd imagine he was followed around by plainclothes agents for the rest of the day. This, however, may not be unusual. Perhaps Kramer even got his own protective detail.

I guess I'm permanently on the books now as a dissident, if I wasn't already. Viva la Revolution! "

cd /home/colyn && ls -a | grep "a life"

2005-12-07T00:28:00.000-08:00

I think the title about says it all.

I'm really retarded, that's all I have to say about that issue. It just seems that my brain decided one day that it really didn't want to do any work. I mean, come on. That's not fair. Gimme a break. Shit.

So yeah. Ummm. I kinda just made this post cause I thought the title was clever.

Firefox? No, no Firefox.

2005-11-15T18:40:00.000-08:00

::sad::

Well, when I first saw this show up in the RSS feed, needless to say I was psyched. Needless to say I put http://ftp.mozilla.org/pub/mozilla.org/firefox/releases/1.5/ on reload every 5 minutes until it didn't show a 404 anymore.

Needless to say I was shocked when it was revealed that this information was spurious. Spurious I say!!

That blowz.

Console Wars

2005-11-09T23:52:00.000-08:00

I thought the non-extant audience of this joint would care to hear my thoughts on the upcoming console wars. Frankly, my money is on the Revolution as A big winner if not the big winner.

Here's Why:

Let's face facts nerds. It's time to man up and admit that our precious videogame industry has succumbed to Hollywood syndrome. As games get bigger, more expensive and complicated to produce and as profit margins get even thinner and thinner on the Triple-A titles (talk of bumping default price of games to US$60???) we're going to see a lot more Maddens and a lot more Halos and a lot fewer Beyond Good and Evils and Icos. Nintendo recognizes this trend and they're the ones who have the straight-up ding-dongs to buck these trends and get down to doing what they do best. Innovating. Nintendo will be the company that, in the words of the baldheaded douche Jay Allard, "grow the market." It has been said that the Revolution controller will make development (read porting EA titles) more complicated. This could not be farther from the truth. Not only does the unique and yes, Revolutionary, controller design allow designers a greater freedom to experiment with immersion techniques (which is an area of design that has been sorely neglected in spite of the increasing sophistication of graphics technology). Not to mention that the Revolution's guts, the architecture of the thing, will probably be the easiest to program for as it follows much more closely a traditional setup. Consider the ridiculous complexity of the PS3's Cell Processor. One PPE with seven so-called "synergistic" processing elements. John (freaking) Carmack has been public in his distaste for the released PS3 dev kits. And if a dude like Carmack thinks your system is dificult to program for, then it is god damned impossible to program for. Carmack threw his praise behind the 360 with it's triple-core (three PPEs) CPU but I think there are a lot of good reasons Microsoft will be an also-ran at worst and a pretender at best.
First things First. Penny Arcade. Perhaps you've heard of it. The entirety of the so-called "hardcore gamer market" certainly has. Therefore the entirety of the "hardcore gaming market" has seen this. Now, I know this is not a deal breaker for the fortunes of a multibillion dollar corporation, but consider that Tycho's newsposts have been awash with praise for the Nintendo DS. Seriously, the dude will not shut up about it. This in combination with Nintendo's fucking smart marketing and Microsoft's shit-terrible ideas about gaming (i.e. that "marketplace" BS? What are they thinking? Core system? I think Steve Jobs is behind the 360). Since I sort of brought up Apple there I'd like to take a short detour into discussing the fact that over a million windows users have switched to Mac this year alone. Why? iPods (the goddamn things). And you know what device will not be able to interface with iPods? The 360. Despite Microsoft's best efforts it seems. Which system most likely will be able to interface with an iPod? The PS3. Seriously, Sony has made a smart move by opening the API of the PS3 (well they had to really, it does run linux after all... (imagine a Beowulf Cluster!!!)). With this new open system Sony has got the one system on the market that actually has the potential to deliver on claims of being a complete media device (Ken Kutaragi has said "this is not a gaming machine").
Ultimately however, I'm not going to make any set-in-stone predictions of who will come out on top. Sony, with the complexity of their system and a lock on the top market share is seeking to pull the same stunt they did with the ps1 that ended up in the death of Sega and the marginalization of Nintendo. Microsoft however has ease of development combined with a lot of exclusive launch titles. And Nintendo has, well, they have fucking Miyamoto. And if all else fails they've always got Mario and Zelda.
Personally, I'm pulling for Nintendo. They've got the promise to give this industry the kick in the pants that it really needs and to make the big publishing houses recognize that there is money in making good, inventive and fun games.

UUUUGGGHHH

2005-11-09T23:24:00.000-08:00

Shitfuckniggassfuckdick.

HLALLHALGHFLAAHLGUALHGALLLALUGHALFHAGLAUFHGAH!!!!

Oh Shit Yes

2005-11-03T20:01:00.000-08:00

I found packages for OpenMSX!!!11 DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS??? THIS MEANS METAL GEAR. AND METAL GEAR 2!!!!11 I think I just died in side a little, of happiness.

I AM HAVING NO LIFE.

2005-11-01T22:19:00.000-08:00

Man it is probably a bad thing that I am not depressed after having spent 4 hours on Memory Alpha. No I don't feel the shame I should feel. I feel enriched. And fuck anyone who calls me pathetic!

I Found Love

2005-10-31T14:07:00.000-08:00

i wish i could find love
like i seen those couples on the hallmark cards find
a love that involves smiling and holdin hands
and lookin on your children as they play with the dogs
i wish i could find a blonde love with mams the size of watermelons
and a 13 inch waist
who always wore a string of pearls
and had a steak on the table when i got home from work
from my job tellin people what to do

Web Crawlin'

2005-10-30T11:31:00.000-08:00

Bitten by a radioactive MCSE he developed the proportionate strength of a nerd! He is:

The Webcrawler!!!

Watch him use his uncanny powers to purge the internet of evildoers!

___________________________________________________________________

you have entered #9yroldsex. Topic for #9yroldsex: "We're having a meeting in the alley behind Chummy Joe's at 3pm tommorow! We'll have candy!"

WebCrawler031: Stop right there! I've come to bust up your little smut peddling ring!

yr_daddy: hey there buddy, how old are you?

WebCrawler031: Fiend! Prepare to be haxxored! By Justice!

yr_daddy: are you sure you wouldn't rather watch some cartoons?

WebCrawler031: Well, I have been known to indulge in Scooby-Doo from time to time...

LATER!

yr_daddy: SAY IT BOY

WebCrawler031: I AM YOUR WIFE I AM MARRIED TO YOU DADDY!!!

A Note About The Internet That I Think You Should All Pay Attention To.

2005-10-28T17:36:00.000-07:00

Note the Opera Browser button over there in my links? Click it. No I don't have some affiliate thing where I get ten cents every time you click it. I'm telling you this for your own good. Listen, I like Firefox too. I think it is a pretty sweet lightweight browser that is secure, standards compliant, and not IE. But for a more comprehensive and convenient and altogether more powerful browsing experience, Opera is the better choice.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME YOU MAY RESUME YOUR NORMAL ACTIVITIES NOW.

Star Trek Is On TV Too Many Times A Day

2005-10-28T14:22:00.000-07:00

I know, that is not something you think you would hear from me. I love Star Trek. And TNG is my favorite series. BUT IT IS ON 36 TIMES A DAY. Granted, I still watch every episode I get a chance to, but dang, after that much Star Trek on Fridays, I still have a bit of the X-Files and an episode of Firefly that I can't just forget about. What am I supposed to do? I can't just neglect them. The adventures of Mal and the gang are at least as valuable and worthy of my time as those of Jean-Luc and the Enterprise. But after six ding-dong hours of Star Trek I'm straight up exhausted.

Guys, I don't know what I am going to do about this problem. Help me, Internet. You're my only hope.

Hugs'n'Kisses'n'Napalm'n'Chocolateteddybears'n'Fireworks,
Flip

I know i'm just sorta postin like hells today, sorry.

2005-10-27T17:51:00.000-07:00

Listen, you don't gotta tell me I've posted too much today. I just feel like clogging the internet with crap.

Also I wrote this:

27 October 05: 1514--

it makes a noise like a dam breakin jussa bit
rattles and coughs and spits out smoke
breaks and bundles and rusts over in a blink of an eye
and i'm laughin just like that
just with that laughing sound like a engine that won't turn over
just bristlin with that rust just hangin on like junk has a tendency
to do.
and i'm burnin just like that
with smoke and stench and steel
too much friction encountered for day to day operation to proceed
smoothly
and i'm spittin out smoke like that cause i heard it killed you

2 POSTS IN A DAY? DID I BREAK SOME BLOGGER RULE OR SOMETHING??

2005-10-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

So lately I've been forced to reevaluate my position re: instrumental music. I used to be all "Instrumental rock is onanistic and dull." And instrumental rock still is for the most part. However, having been exposed to a good deal of non-vocal electronica/techno by our good friends at www.music.for-robots.com I've decided that a lack of vocals, while in most cases is pretty dumb, is not neccesarily a dealbreaker.

This has been an Update On Flip's Opinions.

I'M PRETTY COOL RIGHT GUYS?

2005-10-27T11:53:00.000-07:00

Have I linked Radioclit yet? If you're into wicked weird hip-hop with absolutely soul-crushing bass and beats, check it out. Their "Roll Deep" LP is available for free download. I highly reccomend spending a little bit of your bandwidth on it.

In other news... has anyone else noticed that flipping over the railings in engineering seems to be SOP on star trek:enterprise whenever they get attacked? I have, it's pretty funny.

This episode of Flip Is A Nerd brought to you by The Intar-Web.

jon bon blogger

2005-10-25T22:36:00.000-07:00

i'm very neglectful of my iternet-sponsibilities to an imagined audience... i'm sorry dudes, sorry i haven't updated... sorry...

but anyway, i suffer from a profound lack of anything valuable to say, so i'll probably only update this as an exercise in making myself suffer. here's hoping!

NOUGAT DIPPED PENII

2005-10-22T19:14:00.000-07:00

i still have this? crazy. on second thought it really hasn't been *that* long, but in intar-webs terms its been a hugely long time. i know crazy right? anyway nothing really interesting has happened... college is pretty dull and lame. i know right? i had a pretty sweet day today, i found this amazing flaming lips song. it's called "spongebob and patrick confronth the psychic wall of energy" flipping amazing, you have no idea how good it makes me feel. omg. anyway......... man all the computer i have up at this campus is a compaq laptop, which has me running a broked-up-as-hell ubuntu install because for some reason power management is hella the fucked up and occasionally the thing will just flip itelf off. pisses me off. tried to get windoze back up ons, but i don't have a cd-key, and i'm not willing to go thru the trouble of getting one or freaking trying to get cygwin up and running to run keygens. fuckin stupid power management.

Holy hones.

2005-06-09T22:43:00.000-07:00

yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup. Updatin' the blog.

how bout that....

yuuuuup.

yup.

I've been reading a lot of comics lately... specifically:

Niego, Diesel Sweeties, Wigu, Toothpastefordinner, Cat and Girl, Dinosaur Comics, Penny Arcade, The Journal Comic (Drew Weing), Bolt City, Scary Go Round, Bobbins, Superosity (all the way from '99),

actually i lied i just like making lists.

who's there... what's/that?

2005-05-22T19:27:00.000-07:00

man... graduated and e'ything. woohar... But. i dunno, i think i haven't written a damn thing for about half a year

man, listening to myself try to rap is hilarious. i will never be MC Frontalot. i have a webpage goin for my music up at www.linuxlanparty.waxprosaic.com check it out if you like crappy industrial-synth-pop.

i need to find a job really bad or something. need the cash, plus just something to fill time.

somethin somethin go boom boom bang bang

2005-05-06T19:12:00.000-07:00

add does THE most amazing cover of "who's gonna ride your wild horses" it's about a million times better than the original. check it out at actdead.com

in other news i'm going to see the h2g2 movie in a few minutes, that oughtta pwn.

hey hey hey sha la la....

2005-04-30T21:40:00.000-07:00

new song

enjoy it, it's incomplete...

The Noise and The Confusion

2005-04-16T18:23:00.000-07:00

i am in love with the singer from the decembrists. anyone who can rhyme "away" and "foyer" and not have it sound cheesy is awesome. and the drumming on the legionnaire's lament is also fantastic. they're like if the beatles had been good.

p.s. The Meanness (me) has a good website which is still under construction at http://linuxlanparty.waxprosaic.com

and my latest release has hit songfight, guns blazing, if you want to vote for it.

p.s. the book "eats shoots and leaves" is the worst book ever written. never has there been such a pretentious classist, elitist, anti-everything godawful book written. i couldn't even bring myself to make it through the first chapter. i mean seriously this lady writes like she wants to sound like some stuck-up pseudo-intellectual bitch. don't read it.

i just realized using "p.s." in a blog entry (especially when it is not the end) is a really obnoxious thing to do.

and on another note, what is the deal with all these journalists being taken to court for not revealing sources? what the fuck! that is kind of what facists do.

i am sick of stuff

2005-04-12T14:42:00.000-07:00

it's true.

hullo

2005-03-31T19:47:00.001-08:00

this is what i do with my time

2005-03-23T19:20:00.000-08:00

I create awkward social situations.

I run into shit.

I get the crap kicked outta me by oversized ethnic stereotypes.

chickens comment on my privates.

I wear weird jewelry.

just in case you were wondering.

deep dude, way deep.

2005-03-22T18:43:00.000-08:00

There comes a time in every man's life when he must shut up, buck up, and become Ernest Hemingway for a day. Put all your crippling deficiencies to the side and look at life through the lens of unbridled masculinity. Go buy a fucking gun and go shoot at some animal that has a good chance of killing you first. Go buy a fast car and drive it off a cliff. Drink hard and unhappily. Write terse, short sentences.

Off in the distance, three men were standing near each other. I knew this because I had only recently passed them on the road. I didn't stop. I didn't question why they were standing on the side of the road, doing nothing. I passed them by. And it was only after they were several miles distant I even noticed them. I looked back off the southern end of that northbound car at three men standing by the side of the road.

I never wanted continuity. All I wanted out of life was a series of indistinct and unrelated images. A few moments, pulled out of temporal context, take on an entirely new meaning. I wanted to be a reflector of experience perhaps. A mirror for the vain world to admire itself in. An impartial parser of dead information. A relay point for humanity.

All existence, everything that is and breathes, is a hypostasis of raw information. Our brains are the processor that serves up the endless bitstream to our consciousness. Angels broadcast celestial propaganda through the digital web of the universe. Electromagnetic revelation needs a medium through which to propagate. That medium is life.

Memory is a symptom of confusion, endless confusion that invigorates and awakens perception. We are born into the world with the memory of nothingness onto which we impose experience.

Assuming we were born at all. Most people hold no memory of birth, it's simply accepted. The Origin Question is puzzling. And even the memory of birth is just retelling of the fiction fed to us by the universe.

My mother Knew I would die one day. As she held me in her arms. The doctor said, “You have given birth to a glorious tragedy.” A tragedy that will rock the foundations of earth and heaven. A tragedy that will scream because it is alive and make gods tremble at its might. “You have birthed a human. The most immaculate misconception.”

it's a hit.

2005-03-20T17:45:00.000-08:00

y'all should check out rilo kiley if you haven't yet. i realize i'm a little late on the indie bus for this one, cause they've already been on conan. but seriously, they rock.

so my life eh? not a whole lot.

i wrote this.

cold lips and quiet eyes
she came to me in the night time
she looked me up and she looked me down
let's go boy, go downtown

come on boy, let's go down
go down where we first came around
where i first saw her shine in the streetlight's last
and we held hands on broken glass

broken promises and cold blue air
she left me lying in the moonlight where
we first met not so long ago
where she first said see boy i told you so

she's trying very hard. to ignore the sounds of drowning children coming from the back of the shopping mall where she first heard the sound of a sharp knife coming down on the spine of a burning book and she hopes that she's. nevermind. nevermind.

that will appear on songfight.org under "let's go boy" as "the meanness" in case you were wondering.

junk.

2005-03-14T18:35:00.000-08:00

ad frank really rocks.

kinda reminds me of veldt. except sexier voice. and is in a band called the fast easy women, which is a damn awesome name.

and lifestyle rocks too.

in fact why don't you just check out radio achewood.

now that that's out of the way how're you?

just in case you haven't noticed

2005-03-10T19:55:00.000-08:00

diet coke is still disgusting.

in other news. i finally found my copy of the zoo story, which is good considering i am directing it, and considering that auditions are monday... and i still have to cut it. etc. etc.

i've never been one to talk about my day or my feelings. thoughts always seemed more important, thoughts and actions, feelings didn't need to be articulated. and certainly, you don't need to hear the minutiae of my daily routine.
/*
in case you're interested:

6:00 wake the fuck up
8:00 drag myself to school
2:50 leave school
3:20-3:30 arrive at home
3:30-6:00am vegetative state
/*

i also prattle. in company. with friends i'm usually silent. it's odd, i'm like a social reciprocal. give me casual acquaintance or give me akward silence. besides, words can't do justice to a human feeling of infinite dimensions. i listen to music, i desperately try to create something interesting, i brush my teeth. i also have a dog. and 2 parents. and a house. no job, and a computer. i isolate myself a lot, i don't go out on a limb to seek social interaction, though i'll complain about the lack of it at the first opportunity. i don't enjoy decisions. i think they are unecessecary distractions. i think most of our civilization is an unecessary distraction. distraction from what i don't know. i wear glasses, i am of the opinion they've done nothing but speed up the disintegration of my vision. just like most medicine does nothing but put a bandaid over a shrapnel wound. i think people put too much emphasis on ideology and systems and values and ethics when all that matters is humanity. we also put too much emphasis on "history" and the "past" when all it is is a fiction we've created to explain our current situation. I think most grand works of literature can be expressed in one sentence or less. i think teenagers are terrible writers, with few exceptions. i think the concept of power is the most harmful thing the human race has invented. "there is no emperor, only the people believe there is one, and one man believes it is he." the greatest crime you can commit, in the eyes of the state, is to think for yourself. liberal democrat, conservative republican, east south, north west, it's all two sides of the same coin. both sides have vested interests in maintaining the status quo. neither wants change, they just want face time. power cancels morals, values is just another buzzword for quashing invention, humanity, and spirit. i have hope for the twenty first century. i have hope for humanity.

i am against emphasis.

Finnegan's wake grows more unreadable by the hour while Valis and the Transmigration of timothy Archer rots in the back drawers of some pseudo-hip-intellectual's mind. for dropping in references.

outsider movements are assimilated quietly, watered down, stripped of viability, danger and meaning, and slipped into the shopping malls to be sold alongside the other commodities.

there's no such thing as a bad word. you have every right to yell fire in a crowded theatre. language is a tool, is there such a thing as a hammer that is "innapropriate?" we are taught about fucking in school, they teach girls to take their cunt pills and they teach boys to wear their jimmy-hats. what does it matter what either one is called? it's a sound.

sex really isn't that important. jesus had a penis, ron jeremy is an asshole.

time is sort of an organization of information. by language, by perception, by reason, by denying chaos. by denying that our universe was birthed by a collosal act of violence and destruction. that our universe was created by the destruction of order.

people frighten me in so many ways. first in the "i don't know what to say to you" way and more importantly, in the "who the hell are you" kind of way. it comes from feeling isolated for a lot of my life. like there's no one who really *cares* about me, which of course is silly because my parents do if no one else.

oh and free tibet... yadda yadda...

2005-03-07T19:09:00.000-08:00

ugh, my face hurts. whole head hurts. uggggghh! ugh i say. rar.

so.

that's all.

what more do you fucking want?

2005-03-05T21:50:00.000-08:00

friends, acceptance, personality, love, acclaim, recognition, talent would be nice, anything else?

just that.

naturally shaped head

2005-03-05T21:03:00.000-08:00

cat and girl check it the hell out.

looka me

2005-03-01T23:40:00.000-08:00

hello,

i am feeling bad again. and i shouldn't be because there is nothing really wrong with my life. Tragedies have been in short supply. Weeping should be kept to a minimum.

but anyway. How's life for you? Good i would hope.

bleh

2005-02-27T21:13:00.000-08:00

i don't know why i feel so bad sometimes...

aah, it sucks, boohoo.

so in other news, i'm not doing anything with my life and need to get up off my sorry ass and actually do something productive with my time and all...

or i could play video games.

which would you choose?

Maraschino Cherries, God's Own Poison.

2005-02-24T18:50:00.000-08:00

oh how i wish i was bite sized.

i think mellified man is possibly the best band name ever, sorry greg but "dick rhythmic and the balls" doesn't hold up. especially since this one is a real band.... BURN.

Greg's band has gone nerdcore now, they are called "critical miss" and if you know what that means, chances are you would enjoy their music.

anyway, as to my life (or lack thereof)... the fascinating story, pt a hunnerd.

actually there is no fascinating story, it is just me, going thru each day hand over hand. And it could always be worse. at least i have a million songs to listen to.

stuffnthings

2005-02-22T19:21:00.000-08:00

time makes haste
free toothpaste
shut up and sit down boy
you fool

groovin in the desk chair.

2005-02-20T21:41:00.000-08:00

i think i am dancing to break this chair. i should get off it. that would imply an ipod or some other musical rape device. >:(

no i will burn cd's. many cd's.

watch me, watch me burn
burn the music onto plastic.

i wrote a poem about technology
and how it makes the music.

nothing spells emo like emoticons

2005-02-20T20:57:00.000-08:00

:(

:)

D:

:D

anyway

my day's are uneventful.

my nights are as well. most of my time is spent in front of the computer, which is not healthy. then most of my days are spent at school, which is even less healthy. then there's eating, which should be healthy but isn't.

hmm.

Seuss and McFarlane or The Ichtyoid in the Role of the Superego

2005-02-18T21:05:00.000-08:00

heaven is a man with one brown eye one blue
ilussion seeming one very close
the other quite far away.

and when he's looking at you
with a grin
and a long smile
don't be frightened.

god is a child with a hammer
held in his hand
his tired fingers.

2005-02-17T21:09:00.000-08:00

i am too lazy to lug the scanner up, so i will not be posting pictures what i have drawn. in fact.

in fact, everything is quite.

a real blog

2005-02-16T19:52:00.000-08:00

this will be one. see?

i will keep it updated.

i will post things that are good.

i will punctuate and capitalize properly....

and no one will read it.

first order of business, as an exercise in mental health, i will explain a little bit of myself.

I am Colyn Gremaud. I do not like this name, it sounds as if your tongue is melting when you say it. i ocassionally write things, nothing significant, just limericks, anecdotes, poetry, the ocasionally unfinished play/shortstory/abortednovelfetus. I enjoy stand-up comedy, music, being "indie" (do the kids still say that?), theatre, books, and sex, though i have never had it i can imagine it must be fun, people are always talking about it. it is all over the internet. now i am all over the internet.

i also play videogames far too much.

i like to play the guitar though i am not very good, i also like to sing and dance even though i am not good at those either. but i am okay at them.

i am also a marxist. to an extent.

now that you know a bit of me. here is something i wrote a while ago, do not try to make sense of it, i just opened the dictionary and started pointing.

<3

"or did you swear allegiance to the people
and did they let you down
forgotten by a neodialectic machine
did you sex-dose the clown
flashbulbs and frowns
fell from the sky
and now surround
miss spherical psycho fell from the sky
blasting slap bass lines on her sitar
hopin one day she'd be lit up on a star
pipe dreams always come true
i'm not screamin how bout you
is that jesus bangin his head against the wall

blindfold mr passion
dance his steampipe down
horny seamen fall and drown
aluminum trident cum on neptunes crown
parrallel incisions breakfast ciggarette
late night traction belly dancing ball
punish bad cop paper pushing maw"